Wayne Collins, of Pittsfield, MA, wrote the following lyrics and the melody and did the vocal and did the instrumental for the following:

With a vegan lifestyle
And television dedication,
Glendora lives to 98
With no doctors nor medication

No hospitals
No doctors
No medicine
No pills
No bills
And in the safety of her own home, no accidents or injuries, for the last 3 and 1/3 years

achatwithglendora.com

Jokes

Mother: Teenagers brighten a home.
Dad: They never turn off the lights.

Why was the baby shoe crying? His mother was a sneak, and his daddy was a loafer.

The man said, “The airplane ride I took did not have in-flight movies, but every now and then, your life flashed before your eyes.”

My church would not let me join their Sewing Circle, Cooking Circle, nor their Reading Circle. Why? I’m a square.

Molly said to Polly, “I expect my husband to be exactly what he’s like today.”
Polly: “But that’s ridiculous.”
Molly: “That’s what he is today.”

Tags: The Advertiser